2004-03-22
@ 3:11 p.m. It's only been a week since my last update which is recent for me. I'm impatiently waiting for my professor to call me and I figured if I started writing in here, the phone would soon ring. I'm stressed out as per usual. I'm trying to answer the little essay questions on my graduate school application and I realize I have nothing to write. I really have no reason for wanting to be a librarian. What do I say that won't sound cliche and horrible? What do I say to make them want me? What can I say to help them overlook the not-so good grades? Is there any way to stand out on those applications anymore? I'm terrified and sick of my love/hate relationship with academia. I just don't know what to say. I think my brain is beyond fried. Hopefully I'll have enough brain cells to get the education I want. I also switched topics for my thesis. Now I'm asking whether parents can negate the effects of violenct tv on their kids? Or, does desentization towards violence among children cause them to act out violently. Hopefully this will be easier to write on than the media topic. I'm so scared to death about everything. I hate it. But on the 31st I will have a month to finish this or else get kicked out and probably disowned. Saturday night I went to a drum and bass party out in the boonies with Kaitlyn, Sean and this crazy guy named Andy. We had fun drank tequila and ingested wild and scary substances. Yay. I wonder if I'm spelling tequila right. Oh well, who cares. My mom had surgery for cancer in her vulva today. Pretty scary shit huh. They caught it early so she should be ok. She is in a lot of pain though, so I'm kind of staying around here to take care of her. This had better be the END of this cancer shit. Nobody in this family needs ANY more sick people for a very long time, especially on my mom's side of the family. I wish I could leave though the house. I really want some coffee which I have no money for. I get antsy in this house. I feel like a short-haired Rapunzel. I need to hurry up and finish all this shit so I can get another job. I'm schoolworkaphobic though. Please God let me get through this. Wah I wanna go walking but Mom is making me wait and see if Corwin calls. Older Entries |